This post is part of the ME Awareness Week Synchroblog, hosted today at https://dearlittledisease.jux.com/1225844 with the topic “Being a good family/friend/carer”. To join in, head over and post a link or comment (click the little speech bubble in the top right hand corner).
I think the essence of being there for someone is just that, being there. We lose it in the cacophony of modern life; somehow interpret being there as doing something important, fixing something broken, thinking about the person who needs us there… but not actually being there. It has been said that the measure of love is what you spend your time on, and I agree.
Is “thinking of you” being there? Is “too busy” being there? No. We know what being there for someone means, if we took time to think about it. We know what it would mean to us if nobody was there when we needed them.
Being there is listening in the long silences where our hearts are broken and we have nothing left to pour out.
Being there is laughing alongside each other til our sides ache in a way they usually don’t.
Being there is picking up the phone and calling someone who might need you, just because you care.
Being there is daring to share your own pain with someone who shared theirs with you; to not count them too fragile to count as a real person.
Being there is taking the time to understand someone who is in a place you’ve never encountered.
Being there is visiting someone who’s somewhere you’d rather not go, because they can’t leave.
Being there is treating someone like a person just because they are a person, treating them like you would want to be treated because it could be you.
Being there is what makes the difference, time and again, between someone unable to go on and someone enduring the pain for the hope of a better tomorrow.